When you're dreaming with a broken heart, waking up is the hardest part.

I have come to a point in my life where I'm going to stop trying to please everyone. Now that I've been 23 for almost 2 weeks I think I've earned the right to be able to make decisions for myself, and I am going to stand by these said decisions. I've never been the person who just goes along with whatever everyone else says/does, but I've been finding myself to be that person lately, and I'm done. I'm done watching you stick right by the side of your "boyfriend" even though everyone knows how terrible he is to you. I've been in an abusive relationship. You knew this. You told me to get out. I did. What are you doing? I'm done listening to you talk about leaving your husband. He deserves to know how you feel. We've been friends for 3 months. You've been together for 5 years. I'm done letting you treat me like I'm still 9 years old. I'm 23..you came to my birthday. You were more drunk than I was. Remember...probably not. I'm sorry that I've been sick with the flu for a week, and I'm contemplating not going out for Halloween because I'm afraid if I keep pushing myself, I will run myself ragged. Actually..I'm not sorry at all.

Exchanging body heat in the passenger seat...

While finishing off some last minute statistics homework last night, I remembered that I had a large light blue (my favorite) Gatorade in the fridge. I got a little bit excited..got up from my homework..and grabbed it. However, this particular Gatorade was apparently made with the worlds strongest cap, and I could not remove it. I twisted it..I hit it..I twisted it with a towel over it..I hit it some more..I twisted it with paper towel over it..I dropped it on the ground..nothing. I got it open enough so that I could squeeze it into a cup..but the lid is still tightly sealed, and I'm pretty sure it is laughing at me. Gatorade 1, Whitney 0. Bummer.

Sing us a song, you're the Piano Man.

Because I was super proud of myself for getting my Physics homework done early..I decided to read some of my book and listen to music. I finished as much as I wanted to read tonight, and then started looking for youtube videos of some of my favorite songs...all of which have a lot of piano...which I am a huge sucker for.

I found a strange reoccurring theme between the videos..Jim and Pam.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4BjODVXWME

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hfFv_NuU9I8

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q1rHAwHZwQ4

I can now go to sleep happy.

Little girls don't know how to be sweet girls..Mama didn't teach me.

A year ago today I wrote on a post it note: "Don't worry about things that won't matter in a year" and I've kept it on my wall ever since. Well, as a matter of fact..I haven't worried at all about the stupid things that I was worried about then. So many other things have happened over this year and have taken up all the space my little worry box can hold that the things I was worried about before seem so minuscule now. I think that losing an aunt, cousin and 2 friends will put things into perspective about what you need to spend time worrying about, and what is pointless.

I guess we're all one phone call from our knees...

Whoever the dude is that came up with this original list...is officially my hero. I may just be really tired right now..but I am laughing and completely agreeing with just about all of these right now.

http://melon.posterous.com/random-thoughts-from-25-35-year-olds


My favorites...blowing into a Nintendo game...not mentioning something you've read online by stalking someone...Mapquest skipping to #5....

I am moving back to Grand Rapids tomorrow night..and I'm excited.

I know I know for sure, that life is beautiful around the world.

So if you don't have a house, you are "homeless." What is it called if it's just you and a really big house all to yourself? "Homeful?" That sounds ridiculous..but it's exactly what I am right now. And I don't like it.

And I'm on my knees, looking for the answer. Are we human, or are we dancers?

I've always thought that I wanted to live on my own. I basically have lived on my own the past two years...yes, I shared an apartment with two girls, but we had nothing in common, so I just chilled by myself in my room 99% of the time.

My parents have been in Holland the past couple days helping my sister and her family move, so I've had their house to myself. I thought they were just going to be gone for one night, but I'm on my third night in a row by myself. Eating whatever I want has been great..minus the fact that it's involved take out quite a bit because I've had no energy to cook when I've gotten home from work. I've been able to watch whatever I want. I Hate Valentines Day, which I was super looking forward to watching was TERRIBLE..ohhhmygosh..awful. Unwrapped, Diners Drive-ins and Dives, and The Holiday have all been awesome, as usual. Also, sleeping on the couch and not getting woken up has been super sweet as well.

However, everything was going great...until it stormed last night. Holy crap do I hate storms. I had no idea it was supposed to storm until I got woken up by super loud thunder, and lightning that was so bright, I kept dreaming that I was taking pictures. I'm hoping tonight the weather doesn't decide to screw me over so that I can get a little bit of sleep.

I've slept on the couch because a) I love it, and b) I've decided that I need to be able to hear if someone is breaking into the house. This whole sudden panic about weird noises and intruders makes me feel like living on my own isn't going to be in my future anytime soon.